Mind The Gap

After a one week absence our Prime Minister makes a reappearance. There was a problem for Tony during the week. But story that will be forgotten about soon and let's not speak about it anyway, especially you Bill Shorten. And anyway we shouldn't have that problem in a years time, because Tony has promised us that a good government is coming.


Edition 4

- Cosmo Abbott
- It's French For Yogurt
- The Sledging Of Joyce Mayne By The Coward Alan Lambert


Cosmo Abbott

There's an episode of Seinfeld where Kathy Griffin's character starts tells unflattering stories about Jerry in her show, much to Jerry's annoyance. In the same episode Kramer takes a vow of silence, which he breaks to tell Kathy more stories about Jerry. When Jerry realises the betrayal, Kramer reaffirms his vow of silence with '...All right...starting now'.

Last week Tony Abbott said 'Good government starts today'. He's been in power for about 18 months.

Later in the week the annual Closing The Gap Report, a strategy aimed at reducing Indigenous disadvantage, was tabled in the Australian parliament. Of the 6 initiatives there was improvements in 2, infant mortality rates and indigenous children finishing high school. It's fair to say the rest didn't make good reading. The gaps in life expectancy and health have barely moved. The rate of suicide is 4-5 times higher than in the wider community. There has been little improvements in literacy and numeracy rates.

During the speeches in the parliament re the Report, 6 government members walked out. Apparently those who walked did so not because they were embarrassed about the fact that we have a large part of our population who suffer such major disadvantages compared to the rest of country. Instead they were appalled that Bill Shorten', the Opposition leader, showed a lack of bipartisan support towards our treatment of the indigenous population, when he questioned the role that over $500 million in spending cuts to certain indigenous programs might played in the poor results.

But it's ok. I'm sure next years report will make for better reading because Tony has promised us good government...all right...starting now!


It's French For Yogurt

Apparently the British accent was recently voted the sexiest accent in the world. The rest of the top 5, in order were: American; Irish; Australian; and French.

But what exactly is a British accent? Welsh? Upper class London? East London? Glaswegian? Scouse? Brummie? Surely not Brummie!

For as things stand it means that this

And this

Are sexier than this

Sacre Bleu!


The Sledging Of Joyce Mayne By The Coward Alan Lambert

During a bike ride on the weekend the name of Joyce Mayne got mentioned. For those to young remember, or who don't live in Australia, she ran a chain of electrical stores from the late 1970s to the mid 1990s, until they became part of the Harvey Norman chain. I found an article today that said she did own the stores, I always thought she was just an advertising front for the real owner, say like Peter Wynn is for Peter Wynn's Score.

Part of the reason why I thought she didn't really own them, was because Joyce lived in apartment in North Parramatta, just behind where we lived. It was hardly a salubrious neighbourhood. One day when I was about 13, she walked past the laundromat where I was playing a sit down Space Invaders machine. There were about a dozen of us there and when Joyce walked past, in unison we shouted a line from one of her ads, 'Get lost Jeeves'. We thought it was very funny.

Anyway Joyce didn't take kindly to this. For some reason I got targeted and she asked me my name. Like the coward I was I replied 'I don't know'. Anyway she told us that rudeness like this was why her friend and then top Sydney jockey, didn't talk to strangers.

I know I'm not such a coward now. Years ago when I worked at Centrelink, during a telephone conversation with a manager I gave him a rather blunt assessment of his performance. At some point he told me that I was a coward and wouldn't have the courage to say that with other people around. So as we spoke I typed up what I had said and emailed it to him (thinking about that now, that might have been more stupid than brave).

Whilst I'm braver with strangers or people I don't know very well or Centrelink managers, something else happened on the ride that affirmed that I'm still a coward when dealing with family, or friends or work colleagues who have done something out of line.

When searching for info on Joyce I came across this Joyce Mayne. You need to go about half way down for the bit about her. It has a mention of a book, Joycie's Winning Ways, that I remembered that she had published about gambling and how winning was all in the stars. I don't think it sold very well.